So I’ve been wanting to write a more personal blog post for a while because it feels like maybe I don’t share enough on here. I’ve been thinking a lot about how my life feels really different lately, as in maybe like an adult for the first time ever. So I thought I’d talk about what I want out of this year and what I want to be different, but I’ve been going back and forth on how to share it with you guys. So I’m just going to put it all out there and we’re going to take it from there, deal?
I’ve never been a fan of New Year’s resolutions. I think it has to do with the fact that my birthday is a mere 17 days into the year. I’ve always measured my achievements in life by age, not necessarily by year.
So in a few short days, I am turning 27. This isn’t a monumental birthday by any means, but it’s maybe the first birthday where I’ve started to feel old. I know, 27 isn’t old at all. Maybe it’s more that I’m finally starting to really feel like an adult, if that’s possible. I’m suddenly finding myself saying things like “ugh, youths” and the thought of drinking more than a glass or two of wine just sounds exhausting and like a headache and I won’t make it to barre at 7:45 on Saturday morning. Oh my God, who am I?!?! If I ever bring up green juice in a serious way, please punch me directly in the face.
Last week I somewhat spontaneously flew to San Francisco on a Tuesday night to see my best friend, with the promise of In-n-Out. There are very few people in this world who can give me 4 days notice to be somewhere that I’ll drop what I’m doing to make it happen, but she’s one of them. As the two of us were having dinner, we started talking about all the exciting things happening in her life, a new job, a new apartment, and a new husband. It was so…strange to be having this conversation.
The last time I saw her, we were in such similar places in life, we both had boyfriends we were serious about, somewhat settled in our jobs, and kind of knew where we were going. It felt so odd to now be talking about her wedding and how I can’t bring myself to use Tinder because I know that’s how I’ll meet my murderer. Later in the night she asked me what’s next for me and I told her that I really just want 27 to be all about adventure.
I spent a lot of 26 focused on my career and to some extent guys. I had my first boyfriend and my first breakup, or I guess, non-breakup. Because you know, millenials.
And as if that wasn’t enough torture, later in the year I decided I should also finally tell my guy friend how I really felt about him after, oh god embarrassingly, years.
Yeah, I’m a person you take lifestyle advice from.
Needless to say, Adele’s new album could not have come at a better time.
While that obviously blew up in my face, I really don’t regret it. I’m typically the kind of person who doesn’t do anything without completely thinking through every single possible outcome. So I knew no matter what I could finally move on with my life.
And that’s what I feel like I want 27 to be, a fresh start that’s just about me. I’ve been single my whole life with the exception of like 6 months last year and I’m pretty good at being a single person. I like getting to do whatever I want and not having to ask for anyone’s opinion or input. I’m also willing to change that if the right person comes along. But for now, it’s just not right. I mean honestly, no one can take me on a better date than me.
My goal this year is to travel more. I went from traveling literally nonstop for 3 years to an abrupt halt when I moved back to St. Louis. I traveled some last year, but not nearly as much as I’d like. I have a few trips planned already, but want to be more spontaneous, like flying to San Francisco for two days to see your best friend get married in the middle of the week.
Adventure isn’t only about traveling far and wide, I want to challenge myself to do more new things this year. I want to do something for the first time every month. Challenging yourself and doing new things is kind of scary and it’s also how you grow. I’m definitely someone who needs to be pushed (forcefully, maybe more like picked up and thrown) out of the comfort zone and to get out of my own head.
I’m also trying to be less of an anxiety-ridden sociopath this year. I’ve mentioned before that I’m super type A and it’s really hard for me to let go of control of things. So part of pushing myself to try new things and get outside of my comfort zone stems from this. I need to learn to let go of some of the type A stuff and just live and enjoy a little more.
I also really want to prioritize myself more. It feels like lately I’ve put myself last on the list with work always coming first. I want to do a better job at finding some balance. It definitely means forcing myself to put work down for a couple of hours and finding time to workout everyday. And to just do things that are fun and not always going to get me to the next goal. I can’t operate at 110% constantly anymore.
I’m also trying to take better care of myself this year. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I love sweets and sugar. I mean it’s a real problem. I’ve kind of started to realize that maybe the older I’m getting, I probably should actually be paying attention to what I eat. I’m starting 27 off with Whole30. I’ve had a few friends recommend it, so it feels like a good way to dive right into this new year.
This year really does feel like a fresh start for so many things in my life. I’m hoping to keep moving forward with my goals and to move on and learn from the not so great parts of last year. I’m also hoping prioritizing myself first means fresh, better, and more unique content for this blog.
I know I don’t typically get very personal here, mainly because I tend to keep that stuff private from even my friends, but it feels like a big part of where I’m headed this year and how I got here. And if even one person feels better from reading about my pathetic and frankly ridiculous life experiences, then it’s worth sharing.
Thanks for reading and caring
XO – T